self-study sessions: #1

Music never judges me. It just waits, asking to be played, hoping to be enjoyed. And then somehow, it finds me - that magical song that manages to fill my body with its glorious sound. It asks nothing of me, it just waits and then it appears.

But I have made it my job to judge music. I believe I do a good job of not judging the music that finds its way to me, but I judge the music that leaves my own being, music that wishes to be shared. Every word, I reject -- too cliche. Every chord progression, I scratch out -- overplayed. Even as I sing, “that note was not placed quite right,” or “that pitch wasn’t totally accurate.” My music stays locked inside of me, just asking to be released. Recently, I’ve been questioning the lock. I’ve given the lock so much power that my music has been stuck. But what would happen if I chose to not judge my creative power? What if I took the leap and abandoned the veil of “power” or “strength” and allowed myself to be open? How could I judge my own music then?

These thoughts are what have brought me to Self-Study. Self-Study is the name of the EP I’m releasing in 2019. Self-study is what makes me uncomfortable. Self-study is the active challenge to my vulnerability, the carving away of rigidity of ego. As I write original music and share it, I’m checking myself as a person and who am I as an artist. I’m pushing myself with each lyric, finding myself by asking what it is that I want to say, asking myself how I want to say it. I’m revealing more and more of myself and many times it is scary. While self-study is teaching me hard lessons, it’s exposing something in me that has always existed. Now, I take the step towards it, hoping for freedom from fear.

Songs have been written, and more are to be written and recorded, and then shared with you -- stranger, friend, family member. For now, I invite you to come along the Self-Study Sessions. These sessions invite you along the process I am discovering with each stride. I’ll share my struggles, my successes, my influences, the people who inspire me, my hopes and wishes.

I have a lot of support that has brought me to exploring my truth as an artist. Thank you for coming along the journey. Self-Study marks a new beginning.

Thank you always,

Faith